When your spouse leaves you, your first inclination is usually to seek information as to what they are doing, what they are saying and who they are with. This is natural. This is your one flesh spouse and you are desperate to do whatever it takes to heal your relationship and bring them home.
Don't do it!
The social media posts of your prodigal will NEVER bring you peace. They are based on the lifestyle they are currently living, the lies they are telling themselves and the culture's influence on their decisions. Often those decisions are absolutely counter to the life they were once leading, everything they used to preach they believed and, sadly, counter to the faith in Christ they used to practice. You will almost NEVER find information that brings you peace but rather only heartache and pain.
I can't begin to tell you just how many times I went searching for information that I thought would "help" me understand what my prodigal was doing so that I could better be equipped to "fight it." At least that's what I told myself. I really just wanted something, anything that could make me feel anything but powerless and lacking in control of the situation. I'd convince myself that if I could figure out who my prodigal was with or where my prodigal was hanging out that I could somehow do something about it and even feel better. I never did. I felt worse. The phone records, the social media posts, the rumors about where my prodigal slept last night...all of it only made me feel as if I had received another gut kick. It would knock me down, make me sick, anxious and upset and it would consume my thoughts for the next hours, days or even weeks. I never did me any good.
In time, I realized that I always felt best when I had little idea of what was going on while my prodigal was in the metaphorical pigpen and I felt sick when I knew too much. What is too much, you ask? Too much is when I know information God did not intend me to know. Too much is having information that God first said "Um, Christine, I've got this. You don't need this piece of information to help you in your stand. This piece of information in the long run is meaningless because it's transient. It has nothing to do with the final outcome." Too much information is acquired when I try to play God (because He really does need me to help Him out. Right?!). Too much information and snooping is not trusting God.
That being said, God will in fact fill you in on the details He needs you to know in order to aid you in your stand. He has an amazing and uncanny way (well, He is God after all) of getting you just the right piece of information at the very moment it was needed or could benefit your stand. You find a receipt your prodigal meant to hide, you receive a text that wasn't meant for you, you have a friend who knows nothing about your current status say "Hey, I saw your spouse yesterday at..." Oh, rest assured, God will get you whatever information He needs you to have and on those moments when He does, he expects you to do something about it: pray, fast, make a call, etc. He'll let you know. He loves guiding you. he's teaching you how to listen to His still small voice and He'll also show you how to respond. After all, God wants you reconciled even more than you do...but in His time and in His way.
Let God be your Google! He is using this for you to grow in trust of Him and so he wants to trust he'll get you what you need when you need it. Let God help prevent you from getting information that will only bring you pain. What's the solution?
The solution is the same solution He presented to Peter when he got out of the boat and walked on water: Keep your eyes fixed ONLY on Christ! Don't look left. Don't look right. Don't look down or up. Just look straight at Him. If your eyes are fixed on Jesus and His promises then you cannot possibly see the "mess" that surrounds you or the pigpen your prodigal is in.
Peace will follow. Trust me. Trust Him.
Don't do it!
The social media posts of your prodigal will NEVER bring you peace. They are based on the lifestyle they are currently living, the lies they are telling themselves and the culture's influence on their decisions. Often those decisions are absolutely counter to the life they were once leading, everything they used to preach they believed and, sadly, counter to the faith in Christ they used to practice. You will almost NEVER find information that brings you peace but rather only heartache and pain.
I can't begin to tell you just how many times I went searching for information that I thought would "help" me understand what my prodigal was doing so that I could better be equipped to "fight it." At least that's what I told myself. I really just wanted something, anything that could make me feel anything but powerless and lacking in control of the situation. I'd convince myself that if I could figure out who my prodigal was with or where my prodigal was hanging out that I could somehow do something about it and even feel better. I never did. I felt worse. The phone records, the social media posts, the rumors about where my prodigal slept last night...all of it only made me feel as if I had received another gut kick. It would knock me down, make me sick, anxious and upset and it would consume my thoughts for the next hours, days or even weeks. I never did me any good.
In time, I realized that I always felt best when I had little idea of what was going on while my prodigal was in the metaphorical pigpen and I felt sick when I knew too much. What is too much, you ask? Too much is when I know information God did not intend me to know. Too much is having information that God first said "Um, Christine, I've got this. You don't need this piece of information to help you in your stand. This piece of information in the long run is meaningless because it's transient. It has nothing to do with the final outcome." Too much information is acquired when I try to play God (because He really does need me to help Him out. Right?!). Too much information and snooping is not trusting God.
That being said, God will in fact fill you in on the details He needs you to know in order to aid you in your stand. He has an amazing and uncanny way (well, He is God after all) of getting you just the right piece of information at the very moment it was needed or could benefit your stand. You find a receipt your prodigal meant to hide, you receive a text that wasn't meant for you, you have a friend who knows nothing about your current status say "Hey, I saw your spouse yesterday at..." Oh, rest assured, God will get you whatever information He needs you to have and on those moments when He does, he expects you to do something about it: pray, fast, make a call, etc. He'll let you know. He loves guiding you. he's teaching you how to listen to His still small voice and He'll also show you how to respond. After all, God wants you reconciled even more than you do...but in His time and in His way.
Let God be your Google! He is using this for you to grow in trust of Him and so he wants to trust he'll get you what you need when you need it. Let God help prevent you from getting information that will only bring you pain. What's the solution?
The solution is the same solution He presented to Peter when he got out of the boat and walked on water: Keep your eyes fixed ONLY on Christ! Don't look left. Don't look right. Don't look down or up. Just look straight at Him. If your eyes are fixed on Jesus and His promises then you cannot possibly see the "mess" that surrounds you or the pigpen your prodigal is in.
Peace will follow. Trust me. Trust Him.
RSS Feed
